Dear Campie May 07,1989. Cruel to be kind. The time I believe has come to speak my mind. Without prejudice I have seen a problem from before the time of our being returned from the Fractals in the sixties. Did you know that even at the Fractals, you let others bare the brunt of your denials and inaction? More than once have I received the wrath of Mr. Fractal and others for something the cause of which was you. This is of no consequence to me, however, it dose mark for me the start of events which developed and enhanced your poor attitudes and persona.(32 k-bytes)

As the result of always being sucked up as the baby of the foster family, it would only be natural for you to feel cheated once any balance would be established. Admittedly you have a strong and varied stubborn streak through you, opposing from hey you to very disturbed childish destruction of gifts at age thirty. A child was ignorant but thirty has a different title.

For your information, I want you to be aware that while living with the Fractals, I had been offended  by separate members of that family, their names I will keep in confidence. The point being, is that from even then I do not hold the contempt, bitterness, animosity and belligerence evidently being your excuse or rut in life. People cannot be blamed for being oblivious, if some lesson is learned in life... hurray. Believe as you will but life is not worthy of the cop out... woe is me. Misery dose not always need company.

If you were to really think about it, you yourself are your own worst enemy. Myself I know as well as anybody that I am far from perfect, but I take full responsibility for how I conduct myself, as well as who and what I am today. We could only be so lucky to have been so hard done by, acquiring the lessons to excel in life. At the very least it can be said we survived unlike so many victims to the trials and tribulations of life and death. Hurt and sorrow passes not only yours but most every souls path, and for everyone things are all the same, because it is necessary for people to go forward, picking up the pieces to carry on in the here and now.

How convenient it has been for your world to allow you to perpetually carry out a past life, and make believe existence, exonerating your personal responsibilities of choice, at the expense of whom ever suffers from your fantasy.

I'd bet my last dollar this is why you've been ousted from even the ever glorious Fractals. Eventually any tormented bitch will turn on its pup, in self defense and self preservation. Perhaps a child could get away with this cheating, living in denial of truth. Any one who has been a part of your life has felt and seen how things are distorted, as they have been in your mind for a very very long time. Judgmental I'm not, but empathetic most definitely.

We agree that manipulation is not acceptable behavior yet in a sense, through your convictions not only are you manipulating yourself, but indirectly the position you have placed all those surrounding your life. Again this would be your exorcise of choice, to as always, remain stubborn and wallow. No one will bye it in the adult world. One would almost think you to have forsaken your virtues and values but we all know you need a humbling lesson in humiliation.

"Brothers", we have our differences as well as much more in common than may meet the eye. For one I'm also the lazy sort, but yet I'm aware of what a bar of soap is and I look after myself, cooking meals instead of consuming sweets a box at a time like you have done since a child. Too I do my laundry before it ferments offending smells, a matter of dignity and a conscious choice to live without that stench, let alone imposing it as a guest in another' home or not.

Like everyone before me, since the time when we were kids, in each there own time, we all have eventually tired of the lack of respect due throughout. This respect is visibly refused in the manner which you persist to stagnate throughout any given household. We have all held our breath and tongues, as well having asked, pleaded and hinted fruitlessly for you to grow up, though still the odor of your dirty laundry mounts and ferments in your sty, a product of an immature teenage rebellion. You're having been living in my adult home long enough for the honeymoon to be over, neglect of hygiene in my home cannot be further tolerated or condoned as anyone's doing but your own. The same resulted regardless of your denial at Ginger Way, the only difference is there you forced a no win situation, where religiously you went against the grain, on one hand forcing discipline, and on the other making it fruitless and perhaps even excessively matched by your stubbornness. This tool or control exists not anymore, for now you are not allowed the forlorn child in need act, but are just another face in the crowd. Sounds like telling a teen its either school or a job, but in this case you have finished school so what are the options.

Do not discount anyone's love as it is not subject to "your choice", however as I see it, the large chip on your shoulder has compromised a great deal more than the sanctuary you once had at the Fractals. Where were they then? Where were you then? Where are they now? Where are you now? What do they have now? What do you have now? Why not call and inquire about your belongings left behind? Guess now it sort of evens the score, the call remains yours, but take head that at least I have been completely honest speaking the truth stopping short of nothing but a brothers duty.

I am confident that I have never done you any real harm and that despite expressing your chronic condition and hurt, I have extended my brotherly duty to the max. It has been rewarding for me to help you out in your time of need, but I have concluded that time enough has passed for you to heal and get over it. And so, I wish not to be subjected to the delusion any further. If you desire a lonely subsistence then so be it, but only in all knowing and thus of your own conscience and doing.

If when you are not able to lively up yourself and the air upon squaring your account this month, please consider your welcome overstayed and other accommodations in order. I am willing to forgive any boarding costs inadvertently missed during your tantrums exhibited of resentful denials disguised as your eminent departure from my home. If you decide on excusing yourself, do so with it in mind, I'm glad your my brother and I have always appreciated your help, views and camaraderie.

July 18th, 1989

from: Meeting General Hospital 101 Class Calvasack

Please be advised that your optrectomy operation is scheduled for July 25th, 1995 at 1:00 P.M. The purpose of this delicate operation is to sever the cord that connects your eyes to your rectum and, hopefully, will get rid of your shitty outlook on life.

Yours truly

Dr. Fanny Grabber Chief of Optrectometry

UP:urs